"My favorite fruit is grapes. Because with grapes, you always get another chance. 'Cause, you know, if you have a crappy apple or a peach, you're stuck with that crappy piece of fruit. But if you have a crappy grape, no problem - just move on to the next. 'Grapes: The Fruit of Hope.'"
Demetri MartinTiny Panda Quotes
Quotes by Demetri Martin
Demetri Martin is an acclaimed American comedian, actor, and writer, known for his unique blend of observational humor, wordplay, and visual art. Born on May 25, 1973, in New York City, Martin gained prominence through his distinctive stand-up performances and as a correspondent on "The Daily Show." He later created and starred in his own sitcom, "Important Things with Demetri Martin." With a degree in psychology from Yale, Martin’s intellectual approach to comedy has left an indelible mark on the world of humor, captivating audiences with his clever wit and innovative storytelling.
7 quotes found
"I wanna make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says 'go outside.'"
Demetri Martin"The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly."
Demetri Martin"I think that when you get dressed in the morning, sometimes you're really making a decision about your behavior for the day. Like if you put on flipflops, you're saying: 'Hope I don't get chased today.' 'Be nice to people in sneakers.'"
Demetri Martin"I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog's name. Then I said, 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No.' And I said, 'Oh yeah? Then how does he eat?' Liar."
Demetri Martin
"I like women, but you can't always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dog's name and then I asked, 'Does he bite?' and she said, 'No.' And I said, 'So how does he eat?' Liar!"
Demetri Martin